The Scandal of Cleveland Street

If you want an education then hang out with the homeless. First lesson: (teacher) reputedly, the singer Paul Gadd lived in this block of flats. (pupil) Gary Glitter lived in this block? Did he know before porridge that there’s two flats in this block that are used as high-class brothels? Look how close it is to transport links. Stressed gentlemen can pass away a hour or two being pampered before embarking on the journey homewards thereby avoiding the worst part of the rush-hour while experiencing the highest form of mindfulness. (teacher) To get maximum benefit, three flats now should be brothels. No point letting a good flat in a prime location go to waste. Second lesson (outside the Princess Grace Hospital): (pupil) In the twenty minutes that we’ve been here, we may have come to the attention of police officers from the section that deals with Royal Protection. This hospital treats Royalty and not just from the UK. (teacher) That’s why they banned me from using the disabled toilets. Third lesson: (teacher) Do you know who John McVicar is? (pupil) Are you being daft? (teacher) John McVicar is was a lecturer at Leicester University and when I was in prison he was mentor…

Lesson Four: Three hours in a branch of a ubiquitous, worldwide, chain of cappuccino parlours listening to anecdotal evidence of the disastrous SWEP (severe weather emergency project) combined with a near forensic examination of the governmental and charity finances, that is; the public money supplied by the Office of the Deputy Prime Minister and via charitable donations behind this scheme to aid the homeless, and asking, who really gained? The agency that profited by supplying significant numbers of ill-prepared and poorly trained staff? The SWEP agency staff themselves? Who universally emigrated from Africa to gain economic betterment, achieving such, by working during the Christmas period. Or was it the highly qualified professionals whose expensive oversight signed off this scheme despite not being there on the ground to check if SWEP was being fruitful or not? One thing is for sure, whoever benefited it was not the intended persons, specifically, the homeless living on the streets of London during one of the mildest


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